Throughout our lives we all are labeled with countless adjectives and nouns. They become a part of who we are. Our identity is wrapped up in them. Some of them more prominent in our minds than others.
Cute
Lazy
Kind
Stupid
Compassionate
Addict
Words have immense power! So it only makes sense, that when you assign a label to someone for the remainder of their life, it would greatly affect who they become. It will not only shape their view of themselves, but will also drive their behavior.
The last word in that list above, has been a nemesis of mine. I cringe when I hear it.
*Addict*
Emotions flood my soul. Mainly shame. Our society permanently labels people who have struggled with addiction. It warns that you will never be free from it’s grip. That it will always be looming in the shadows awaiting your return. That you must spend each day dogging it. Hoping above hope that you will make it safely to your bed each night having successfully added another day to the sobriety calendar count.
After realizing how deeply the label affected me. How much it gutted me when I associated it with who I am today. I made the choice to remove it from the inventory of my personhood. It may have been who I was, but it is not who I am. I decided I would no longer allow others to dictate who I was, and in turn what my future would look like. Because let’s be honest here – Our society creates a pretty grim picture of those who have struggled with addiction. Come on guys, when you give people no hope – why on earth would you expect anything less than failure from them!
… Once an addict, Always an addict
… Relapse is a part of recovery
… One day at a time
White knuckling it doesn’t have to be a part of the process. I can tell you from experience. I’m certain many people will disagree with my viewpoint here. Some may even say that I’m in denial. That it may somehow be dangerous to my very own sobriety to not accept that label into my identity. However, I don’t believe so. I believe the exact opposite is true. To own such a term, to accept it, places me in a vulnerable state. One where I’m waring from a position that cannot be won. One where I’m perpetually treading water, that will ultimately lead to me drowning when the waters (or circumstances) become too much.
It hasn’t been an easy thing to remove from my identity. For a variety of reason. One of them being because others ascribe it to me, even those who love me dearly. If I’m honest with myself, I use to as well. Over the past year or so I’ve gained some ground. The realization that I did not need to own the term “addict” has enabled me to reconstruct who I really am.
I am not who they say I am. I am who HE says I am.
… Forgiven
… Made New
… Loved
… Precious
… Redeemed
… Beautiful in His sight
… One of a Kind
It has been said that it takes multiple positive comments to counteract negative ones. So it would only make sense that the same would be true about what we believe about ourselves. We are our own worst critics. Therefore – stop the negative self talk! I’ve chosen to.
I am…
A Great Mother
Loving.
Compassionate.
Fun.
Humorous. (Or at least I like to think so, but my kids may disagree. They would probably describe me as “cringey” instead. For those of your with kids you’ve likely heard this term.)
Courageous.
A Fighter.
Intelligent.
You are the writer of your story. You choose who you become. Don’t dare allow others dictate that for you! Take a personal inventory of what you’ve allowed to permeate your identity. Realize that you don’t need to own them! You have a choice who YOU are, Stop letting others dictate it for you!
Labels only confine… aspire to be undefinable!
…… “Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new” – 2 Corinthians 5:17
Only By His Grace 